St. Ignatius once said, “Love is ought to show itself in deeds, more than in words.” On January 30th, Delbarton welcomed Michael Fowlin, an inspirational, eye-opening speaker and a Rutgers graduate psychologist, who works to make the world better through his unique and life changing programs. During Dr. Fowlin’s (aka Mykee’s) presentation, he instantly grabbed the attention of the audience through the different “masks” or “personas” he employed.  These masks included a six-year-old boy with ADHD, a football star too embarrassed to share his deepest thoughts, a high school introvert, and an adult with cerebral palsy who has felt invisible his entire life. Mykee was able to transform himself into each character, allowing one to feel a part of each character in a mysterious way. Through these “enactments,” Mykee was able to demonstrate how people are entitled to their own beliefs and our own preconceptions and assumptions pervade our thoughts about different types of people. He explained that we were masks, because we don’t want to be judged or rejected.

Mykee believes that society has conditioned humans to exclude anything that seems different or unique. As explained in his presentation, “We learn from a young age that people are different. Remember your 1st grade homework assignments? The teacher gives you a paper and tells you to cross out the things that are different and don’t belong. We learn it on children’s shows.  “Sesame Street” – “One of these things is not like the other”. Now these teachers didn’t realize they would have this much of an influence on us, but they did. Why not instead of crossing them out we put smiley faces next to them? Yes they are different, but everyone is.” Mykee believes from that weak, yet powerful lesson in preschool, we continue to “cross” out anything that doesn’t appear to be “normal” to us.  We often “cross” out the person who is fat, mentally or physically disabled, gay, or even artistic, all people who were portrayed in Mykee’s presentation. The people who feel invisible in life because they didn’t make “the cut” often experience a great deal of personal pain and sadness.

As a teenager, Mykee struggled to make friends and was often known as “the weird kid”. However, Mykee actually liked being considered weird. He found that by embracing this quality, he could make bullies uncomfortable and prevent them from continuing to mock him. As he explained, the only way to grow as a person is to use that pain as power. Each and every person in the world is experiencing some sort of pain, including those individuals in the Delbarton community.

Placing others in your shoes will force you to ask questions. Would I make fun of my weight? Would I make fun of my mental or physical disability? The answer to all of these questions is, or at least should be, no. Although cliché, everyone is unique in their own way, because everyone has their own weaknesses and strengths. Living a life of love, prayer, and acceptance will not only make you a better person at Delbarton, but in every other community as well.
Mykee’s presentation impacted me greatly. I realized that I am extremely judgmental, and I am often annoyed at how I lack certain qualities that others have. Mykee’s program helped me to not judge others for what they are on the outside. I should instead focus on understanding other people through kindness and appreciation. Furthermore, he taught me to recognize the rules and practices Jesus has taught us and actually follow them. Pope Francis is an excellent example of someone who follows in the steps of Jesus. Pope Francis teaches the world to not judge, but rather to accept all children of God for what they are and for what they are not. His teachings resemble the true message of God, similar to the message Mykee has left Delbarton. Dr. Mykee Fowlin has “left the tools in the shed”, and it is our duty as Delbarton men to do the work and live out his message.  As Pope Francis once said, “Help one another, this is what Jesus teaches us. This is what I do. And I do it with my heart.”